Rising up

I honestly don’t know how to even begin this.  A few months ago, I began worrying that we could wind up with a President Trump.  I worried about how to bring up my concerns because I live in a world where my husband is a staunch Republican and so is his family.  I’m a bit of an anomaly in that world.  I didn’t grow up like that and I don’t subscribe to those beliefs no matter how difficult that makes my life.  And trust me, it’s made life difficult.  My husband and I cannot discuss politics or world events.  I knew what I was getting into when I married my husband, but I will admit, that in practice it’s much more difficult than in theory.  I miss being able to commiserate about politics with someone close to me.

When I was a child, my grandmother was my major political influence.  She voted in every election regardless of how small it was.  She was a Democrat down to her very core and she cried when Ronald Reagan was elected.  I am my grandmother’s granddaughter.  I am proud of my liberal leanings.  My grandmother was a true inspiration.  She married a disabled man in 1938.  In 1938… in the midst of the depression, my grandmother married a man with brittle bones.   She had one child who was born with the same bone disease.  She then home schooled that child when no schools would allow her to attend their school.  She then took my mom and I back home when my mom and dad split up.  She raised me to think with both my head and my heart.  She was the best person I have ever known.  And yet, here we are.  In a world where our new president made fun of a disabled reporter and stated that it was okay to grab women by “the pussy”.  That’s not taking into account his stance of LGBTQ rights, or reproductive rights, or his determination to destroy the ACA.  He is a despicable man and a disgrace as President of the United States.  I am embarrassed that this is what we have become.

I worry that we are in the midst of something horrible that we won’t understand until it’s over.  I worry that this is what people felt in 1930’s Germany.  I worry that I am not doing enough.  I worry that my rights as a disabled woman in a country that has always felt so safe are being taken away.  I worry that I won’t do anything to stop it.  I worry that those I love will not support me as I attempt to hold true to my values.    I worry. I wish I had an answer for how to fix this atrocity that has begun.  I wish I had a way to wave a magic wand and suddenly there was less hate in this world.  That there was less fear in this world.  I wish I could fix it all.

But today gave me hope.  So many people came out in support of the Women’s March.  So many voices chanted the thoughts I have carried in my head.  And for that I thank you.  You give me hope.  You are the reason that we are the nation people fight to come to.  You are the reason that the world is a little less dark.  A little less bleak.  I honor you.  I stand with you and hope that one day I can be brave enough to stand with you in more than just spirit.  For now though, please know that this cowardly liberal woman stands with you and loves you all.  I have never been prouder of my brethren.  Kudos to you.  You are what makes America great.  Never forget it.

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